So what happens when you keep trying at something and end up
getting nowhere? Do you just give up and walk away? Do you grit your teeth and
deal with the agony? I wonder.
It’s not so much the working situation that befuddles me, it
is all of the other emotional crap that confuses my mind; and the frustrating
part is that I don’t want to just end it and turn my back. But when do we stop
and say, “hey, I am worth more than this, I don’t need to put up with this shit!”
I think that we all want meaningful relationships in our
lives, (family, friends, or more) but how far are we supposed to go to achieve
these things? I guess it is all about how much we love ourselves, how much we are self aware. This question was asked of me recently, and I was kind of
stumped; "how do we love ourselves?" As I tried to get through at attempting an
answer, I wondered how much do I really know of my own self-worth? How much do
any of us know?
Maybe it is all about confidence; not that exuberant and
spirited kind of confidence, but that underlying quiet confidence. That thing
inside that says instead, “yes, I am worth more than this and I will put up
with it because I can handle it.” Maybe I am being the stronger one for knowing
what I want and not turning away.
It is all so confusing that I want to scream “what the
hell?”
Enough being enough, for me anyway, seems to change quite
often. From situation to situation, from person to person. And maybe, that is okay. Maybe the questions
to ourselves don’t always need solid, standardized answers. The answers change,
they morph, they grow.
Maybe.
